How “Get Ready With Me” Videos Shape Identity

The “Confessionals” of our time

Get Ready with Me or GRWM is a visual of someone’s life, a portal into a curve of emotions including humor, sadness, and joy. Posters can gain an audience, evoke a response, and, when possible, a conversation. In the video, how the person is getting ready – and where they’re going – varies. It could be as simple as getting dressed for the day or getting a party set up, but what matters is that they are inviting you, the viewer, into their thoughts.  

GRWM content can also be considered the peak of capitalism – someone sharing their favorite lip liner or hand cream or socks that you, the viewer, cannot live without. There is sponsored content, where the person has more pep because money is behind the smile. Sometimes the overriding sense that you must have these ten items or your life just can’t be worthwhile saturates the whole video.

As I lessen my consumption, I am still drawn to watching a GRWM. This is also coming from someone who loved “Real World” confessionals. There is intimacy in someone sharing their thoughts, getting into the minutiae of their experiences. Sometimes I even gain inspiration. GRWM has evolved into sharing ways of rest, a first date after a heartbreak, or another deeply personal moment. There is the hilarious Grandma Droniak, who shares wisdom through her GRWM. 

I mostly watch Vogue’s Beauty Secrets on YouTube. I have noticed over the years there were a ton of “date night” videos, especially when oftentimes a woman was married. Though I sometimes felt the video category felt stifling, as though a woman becomes this sole entity when she becomes married, this particular channel has evolved. Now there are people sharing character and personality, sometimes embodying an aesthetic such as “party girl.”

Sometimes the videos have also morphed into forms in promotion – for someone’s upcoming film, or album drop or a beauty campaign – but underneath it all there is still the candor and personality that the individual arrives with.

More Men GRWM Videos, Please?

I believe, in part, the patriarchy will be dismantled when men have spaces to share their experiences, desires, and wants. adrienne maree brown discusses this in her essay “Relinquishing the Patriarchy” in her upcoming title Loving Corrections, which builds upon previous work in her Emergent Strategy series. We’ve covered Pleasure Activism on the site before. Men, for the most part, have been fashioned to believe that being “alpha” makes them a man. Toxic masculinity loses fervor when men are vulnerable, a position that they may have to nurture on their own. 

I love the Bloom and Plume videos from creator Maurice Harris. His consistent “Capitalism Doesn’t Care About Your Creativity” creates a conversation to get out of fears and to program away from societal expectations. I also love this video from Jalen Noble, sharing what he has learned about trust through learning about love, all while making a flower arrangement. Men are absolutely capable of being the soil, growing what was not nurtured to them. They are pulling away the weeds of fiercely embedded alpha falsehood. 

I would love to see more men getting ready for dates, a night out with friends – and I’d like to see space on the internet for them to nurture their perspectives, relationships, and their lives outside of the boundaries that the patriarchy has laid out for them. Something bigger and more expansive which allows us all to then thrive. A bountiful audience is ready to receive your bouquet of insight, unlearning, and blooming.

I also highly recommend watching Niall Horan’s GRWM for Vogue Beauty Secrets. Taking care of your skin is also a way to show up for yourself. Let your soul glow!

End Scene

I believe that self-expression is an ever-evolving commitment to growth. GRWM videos are a space to explore what is unfinished, unfiltered, and unflinching. With self-expression, what often is in tandem with spending and consuming can also be in a relationship with learning. I hope that GRWM continues to grow more into diary entries. 

Ashley Paul

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Ashley Paul is a traveler, runner, and baker. She is an Everlasting Bookworm and Culture Maven. She is passionate about supporting high school juniors and seniors to write compelling stories for their post-secondary careers. She loves stories with social commentary, atmospheric writing, and compelling characters.